Hard Truth

There have been things happening in my life that I do not like. That I seem to regret almost immediately after, I am partly happy and excited for all the fun I’ve been having but there is something inside of me that is disappointed. I hold myself to high standards because I know I’m capable of having high standards. I know that for my words to be truly respected in this world my actions have to reflect them.
The other day, I was in a place I know I should not have been. There was an older gentleman there who was talking about religion and lots of other stuff. I admire this man because he had no shame in saying who he believed in despite the current environment he was in. I was uncomfortable because of where I was. I thought it inappropriate for him to be asking everyone in the room, “who do you believe in?” when I or another would respond, “God” that wasn’t enough of an answer for him. I understand that not being enough, because that answer is not offensive and is general. We are human and that’s how we act because we can’t be ourselves. We aren’t allowed to be offensive but are allowed to be offended. Let me just say that again, we aren’t allowed to be offensive but are allowed to be offended. Ridiculous.
I answered him… both times with the correct answer. My shame comes in having to answer him both times. My shame comes in having to feel embarrassed by that. My shame comes in realizing that I never use to be this way. I wasn’t afraid to speak boldly about things I was so opinionated on. I wasn’t rude or aggressive concerning my opinions, always open. People felt comfortable disagreeing with me and me with them because it was OK to differ in opinion. This short exchange has bothered me immensely. It’s taught me a lesson.
There are things that we believe in and things we don’t. There will be things people agree on, disagree with, that are hard to chew haha, because we are all different. We shouldn’t limit our minds so much that once I tell someone “yes, I believe in Jesus Christ” they immediately think that they know me. That all of a sudden they’ve got me figured out because they know all “those other Christ believers.” We are disgustingly close minded as people that we can’t even bother to think outside the box. To take in all that you’ve experienced with me prior and just forget that you know me and fill in the blanks with new stereotypes. What it comes down to is we are all human. I make mistakes, foolish decisions, and selfish decisions, lose myself constantly but I am still who I am at my core and I will come back to the better me I know.
If you do know me, you know that I am vulgar, sometimes have a sailor’s mouth, witty, have crude humor. I am also, funny, loving, kind, thoughtful, and smart. Basically what I am trying to say is don’t be afraid to express how you truly feel about something because of the situation or environment you’re in. Be true to yourself. Be open-minded with others. Be changing always for the better. And stick to your core if it be something you truly believe to be true, have enough of a backbone to share with people your heart, your mind, and your soul. They deserve the real you just as much as you do.

One thought on “Hard Truth

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  1. I really love this post! We should all be cognizant of our ability to have conversations with people of differing opinions. The world would be a much better place, and we can help move it in the right direction through having a skill like this. It’s not easy, but it’s necessary. Great post, Gena

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